Adam’s Asshole

“When God made man there was only one. The various parts argued about who would be boss. The hands said they should be boss, because they did all the work. The feet thought they should be boss, because they took…

Adam said…

“What a good thing Adam had going. When he said something he knew nobody had said it before.”

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The Spelling Error

In an ancient monastery in a faraway place, a new monk arrived to join his brothers in copying books and scrolls in the monastery’s scriptorium. He was assigned as a rubricator on copies of books that had already been copied…

None

Morris was passing a small courtyard and heard voices murmuring. He went in and saw an altar with a large zero in the middle and a banner that said 'NIL.' White-robed people were kneeling before the altar chanting hymns to…

Is God black or white?

A confused nine year old boy goes up to his mother and asks, "Is God male or female?" After thinking a moment, his mother responds, Well, God is both male and female."

This confuses the little boy so he asks,…

God’s Promise

A hippie dies and goes to the Pearly Gates. St. Peter looks him up, and says, "I'm sorry, but you'll be going down to Hell."

The hippie, astounded, peers through the gates and sees God walking in the distance. "God!"…

Jesus fills in for St. Peter

Jesus decided to go say hi to his old buddy St. Peter, so he strolled out to the Pearly Gates and noticed a HUGE long line of people waiting to get in.

St. Peter saw Jesus coming and said "Oh,…

The Post Office

A minister asked a little boy how to get to the Post Office. After the little boy told him, the minister said, "Why don't you come to church tonight? I'm giving instructions on how to get to heaven."

After thinking…

Four Catholic Schoolgirls…

Four Catholic schoolgirls all die in a car accident. They wind up at the Pearly Gates, and St. Peter says: "You're all virgins, so I can let all of you in, but first I have to take your confessions. Tell…

God’s Vacation

God is tired, worn out. So he speaks to St. Peter, "You know, I need a vacation. Got any suggestions where I should go?"

St. Peter, thinking, nods his head, then says, "How about Jupiter? It's nice and warm there…

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