Profiles
Monthly Archives: July 2006
The Post Office
A minister asked a little boy how to get to the Post Office. After the little boy told him, the minister said, "Why don't you come to church tonight? I'm giving instructions on how to get to heaven." After thinking … Continue reading
Four Catholic Schoolgirls…
Four Catholic schoolgirls all die in a car accident. They wind up at the Pearly Gates, and St. Peter says: "You're all virgins, so I can let all of you in, but first I have to take your confessions. Tell … Continue reading
God’s Vacation
God is tired, worn out. So he speaks to St. Peter, "You know, I need a vacation. Got any suggestions where I should go?" St. Peter, thinking, nods his head, then says, "How about Jupiter? It's nice and warm there … Continue reading
The Confessional
Three men are outside the priest's confessional area talking about their sins while waiting for the priest to finish. One admits to beating his wife up; the second admits to gambling his wages away and the third admits to committing … Continue reading
The Miraculous Hand Soap
One morning, 2 priests head to the showers and it isn't until they are already in the shower they both realize they did not bring any soa Father Bob decides he'll run back for the soap, so he checks out … Continue reading
The Resurrection of Christ
One of the basic tenents of Christianity is the resurrection of Christ. It is generally believed that this refers to JESUS CHRIST being crucified on the cross and then returning back from the dead three days later. While this makes … Continue reading
How God created evil
God created Adam 6th day. He took a day off and looked at Eden, and found Adam was jerking off all day. Since God was not wise enough to create Evil yet, he couldn't kick him out of Eden. Instead … Continue reading
That Useless Tit
After three weeks in the garden, God came to visit Eve. "How's things, Eve?" He asked. "It is all so beautiful, God," she replied. "The sunrises and sunsets are breathtaking, the smells, the sights, everything is wonderful…but I just have … Continue reading
Good News/Bad News
One day God came to Adam to pass on some news. "I've got some good news and some bad news", God said. Adam looked at God and said, "Well, give me the good news first." Smiling, God explained, "I've got … Continue reading
What Nationality were Adam & Eve?
A Briton, a Frenchman and a Russian are viewing a painting of Adam and Eve frolicking in the Garden of Eden. "Look at their reserve, their calm," muses the Brit. "They must be British." "Nonsense," the Frenchman disagrees. "They're naked, … Continue reading
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